Tuesday, September 13, 2011


Monkey is my youngest and last child.  A and I made a conscious decision that she completed our family.  So I guess in some way, knowing she was it, we've babied her much more than we did Zoe.  And because Monkey is so headstrong and willful, I suppose I could confess that we've let her get away with much more than we ever did Zoe.

I realize that's not fair.

But another confession?  There are some days where you just have to pick your battles.  There are some days when, after about the sixth hour of screaming, you give in.  I'm not proud of that, and I know it's not ideal.  I know that psychologically it's telling her, "scream and you get what you want."  I get all that.  But some days it just happens.

But let me tell ya'll.  Backtracking and trying to fix that is HARD FREAKING WORK.  She's older now and (as all mothers would say) very bright.  I can reason with her now, and she understands logical thought (sometimes).

When we started using sticker charts with Zoe for behavior modification and to teach her the value of contributing to the family through daily chores, Monkey was far too young to understand the concept - or perhaps it was even before she came along, I can't remember.  But as Monkey got older, she wanted a sticker chart too.  Now that she's 3, the sticker charts actually mean something to her and she earns them and she's understanding the system well.  Once it's filled up, she gets to exchange it for a small prize or a playdate with a friend.

It's working - this week.  Yesterday was a really tough day on the two of us.  She pushed and pushed and pushed and I didn't give much.  I compromised with her (for I feel that's an important lesson too), but I didn't cave, no matter how loud she got. 

I still think this is fixable.  Wish me lots o' freakin' luck.


  1. Of course it's fixable. Not easy (not necessarily pleasant) but fixable. The only way it couldn't be fixed, is if you gave up and I know you're not going to do that.

  2. It is fixable and it will work. I will always, always be glad of the fact that I nannied before having my own children. It was a great way to see ways that did and didn't work with children! Unfortunately for me I didn't nanny for any children over the age of 8 and now my oldest is 8 1/2. Oh help!


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